Pics, Struggles and Prayer

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Here are just a few scenes from this trimester at the youth leadership institute in Buenos Aires... learning, personal formation, celebrations and sharing life together. It is definitely not a boring place to be.

Over the next 3 weeks there will be a more than normal amount of work and stress due to the confluence of 3  milestones:

1. End of trimester exams and projects (now until May 19)
2. Interviews of prospective students for next trimester (starts May 30)
3. A 3-day "Amazing Race/Survivor" sort of retreat for students (May 20-22)

We have also had a lot of students who are struggling with tough emotional, physical, work and family related issues. Our role as spiritual directors is to accompany, encourage and love them thru these times. It is a privilege to serve these dedicated youth workers in this way and, as you can imagine, it is also a significant burden. 

Please pray for us and for them during the next 3 weeks. We need it.

Tell Me What to Do

Scenario 1

While not the people from the story,
these are young leaders we work with

Our encounters had a regular pattern: student “A” would explain the details of a situation she was worried about (with her church, family or boyfriend) and I would listen closely, trying to get as clear a picture of the issue as I could. Then she would ask me what she should do. Instead giving advice, I would try to help her think through the issues surrounding the situation so she could decide for herself what she should do. All the while she would continue pressing me for my opinion.

I confess that the first few times we met I gave in. I had an opinion and was happy to share it with her if it helped. But as time went by I realized that my feedback wasn’t helping and I began to resist giving it. Then I heard from student “B” that student “a” had asked her to be her mentor, so she had a new source of advice. This didn’t solve student “A”'s problems or quench her desire for my input but it helped me see the situation more clearly and it strengthened my resolve not to tell her what to do but to make her responsible for her own decisions.

Scenario 2

For weeks I had been talking with student “C” about a very tense situation where he is youth pastor. A misunderstanding with the senior pastor about work expectations which could have been resolved between the two of them was exacerbated and affected the whole community when the pastor publicly removed the youth pastor’s teenage son from the worship band without talking with the father/youth pastor. I had been talking with him about the situation for weeks but as things reached a critical point he set up an appointment to bring his wife to meet with me and Tim. I was dreading the encounter because I was out of ideas.

a training exercise during our week-long coaching training

Providentially our Spanish colleague, Felix, just happened to be passing through Buenos Aires that afternoon and was willing to meet with us all. Not only does Felix have more experience and more wisdom than we do, but he had recently received training in Coaching. He had told us about the program but that afternoon we got to watch the process. In about forty minutes he was able to find a path through the jungle of details and emotions and help the student and his wife to identify what their next steps should be, create an action plan and a timetable for their implementation. We were all tremendously grateful for his help and I was in awe of what Felix managed to accomplish in such a short time.

coaching training with Sara, Nell and Kyle (friends and colleagues)

These situations highlighted my need to add some more tools to what we use to help people grow and mature. So in April we went through the Coaching training Felix had recommended, along with his wife Sara and OC colleagues who also work in the Spanish speaking world. It was some of the best training we've ever received  and this week we have begun using what we learned

How to Burn Calories and Sleep Deeply

Our new student orientation and "old student" welcome back party

Annette teaching at the Instituto Especialidades Juveniles

We anticipated that the first week of classes would be busy but had no idea what all it would end up entailing. During these past two weeks we have among other things:

• interviewed 4 new students
• interviewed 2 pastors of new students
• hosted an orientation for 10 of the new students which was followed immediately by a welcome party with older students
• prepared and taught 11 hours of class
• participated in 2 staff meetings
• attended a wedding of a student
• met with new full time students to talk about their acculturation process
• met with assistant teachers who are helping us this trimester.

The fact that things are going well at the Institute and that we have a lot of the bugs worked out has meant that God spread us out to meet other needs, specifically the deteriorating relationship of some new friends.

Their relationship has been bad but this week things really began to unravel. We helped set up a meeting with a counselor/mediator from our church here and it became clear they could/would not agree on terms for a contract specifying how they will share time with their newborn baby. The details make it a long story but where it touches our life is that He has spent the night here most of the week. He is very spiritually sensitive in his brokenness so we spend long hours talking. We also spend intense time with her.

We appreciate your prayers as we try to be God's agents in their lives without letting it consume our lives, but for right now we're in the trenches.

How NOT to Ride a Horse

Annette and I recently arrive home after a long weekend at an "estancia" (ranch/farm/plantation) in the province of Corrientes, Argentina. Our friends, Terence and Noelia, invited us along with the Borghetti family. Esteban and Elizabeth Borghetti have been working with us to set up the youth leadership institute for the last 3 years and have become close friends. Their three girls are almost like nieces to us.

The estancia is in the province of Corrientes, N.E. Argentina, an 8 hour drive from Buenos Aires. The landscape was nearly 100% rural and agricultural and a bit like Kansas or Oklahoma... flat green farmland, trees only where planted, sky everywhere you looked and and every once in a while some low rolling hills. (map=> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Argentina#Administrative_divisions)

We arrived around 10:30 pm after getting a flat tire and changing it (see pics). This happened just 4 miles from our destination on a dirt road in the dark with mosquitos sucking our blood to their little hearts content.

Every morning after breakfast we went out to the stables where Pucheta, the gaucho cowboy, had horses saddled and reading to ride. The first morning Annette decided to run instead of ride. As the rest of us passed her on our horses she waved and began to jog behing us just as my horse spooked and shot forward into a gallop. I hadn't ridden in years but wasn't too scared because the horse ran smooth and i used the reins to pull it around in a wide 50 yard circle and came up along the rest of the group but when I pulled back and said "Whoa" the horse shot forward into the fastest gallup i've ever experienced and straight toward a stockyard fence. Pulling the reins back to slow him and to the left to turn him away from the 6-foot high fence, I called to Esteban Borghetti for help but just then the saddle slid left and began to go under the horse. Yikes. Somehow I swung my left leg over the top of the horse and pushed off into the air and toward the ground on the right on the galloping horse. I hit hard but rolled and stood up. Everything seemed to be intact as I heard Annette's scream echo off into the distance everyone gathered around my and asked how I was. Pucheta road up on his horse got my saddle back in place, cinched it well and said urged my to get back on. But my leg muscles were tight and my forearms cramping so, as embarrassing as it was, I declined. Annette and I and walked back to the main house where I changed into a bathing suit and jumped into the cold pool to calm the bruised and aching body I was dragging around.

Since the bruises were on my back and rump, Annette took a photo of them to show to me (somehow seeing the bruises legitimized my aches).

Annette and the rest of the group went horseback riding most mornings, came back and ate lunch and swam with me and then usually a smaller group went out again. After a couple days I was able to get back on a horse and have fun with everyone else again.

Annette rode approximately 13 hours total during her 4 outings and had a blast. She kept singing the 80's pop song by Boys Don't Cry, "I wanna be a cowboy" but changed the lyrics to "I wanna be a COWGIRL, and you can be my cowboy". She literally sang it out loud as she rode the horse (and not just once). In case you've forgotten this forgettable song, here's a reminder: www.youtube.com/watch?v=s05jcrJw0as

Hope you enjoy the pics (click here) as much as we enjoyed the weekend... but with less contusions :-)

Anchors and Sails

During our “summer vacation” we were able to spend quality time with our parents, our sisters and their families, some friends, and a few of the churches who support us. Over dinner one off these friends explained that his roots are getting deeper where he lives and then asked us, “What does that look like for you?” 

As I considered this question I realized that our lives have more in common with a sailboat than a tree. Since we got married almost twenty years ago, our location has changed regularly depending on whether we are stocking up with resources for our voyage—for example, getting training of some kind or touching base with those who support us financially—or whether we are unloading resources for the benefit of others, primarily through training or mentoring people who work with teenagers and young adults.

Instead of having roots for stability and nourishment, a sailboat depends on an anchor to hold it firm when needed and on the sails that propel it on its journey. We have a wide variety of people who serve as anchors in our lives. They are models that guide and inspire us and individuals who prevent us from drifting or being carried away in a storm through their prayers and because they know us well enough and are abreast of the issues in our life and work to ask the questions and provide the counsel we need. And we have those who are like sails that propel us into the work we are so privileged to do by their donations, their prayers, and their encouragement. 

We are regularly amazed at the support system we have and we channel our gratitude into prayers for their well being. And we pay it forward by striving to be both anchors and sails for those around us.

Sledding during Summer Vacation

No sooner did classes get out at the EJ Institute than we took advantage of the school’s summer vacation to head north for Christmas. Over the years we’ve learned that the holidays are a good time to visit the US because 1) nothing much happens in our work during that time because everyone is busy with other things and 2) back home we can see a lot of friends and family in a short time. Oh and 3) we like being home for the holidays.   

The 90 degree weather in Buenos Aires made it hard to pack for 30 degree weather on Lookout Mountain, TN but the warm welcome we’ve received - and some Goodhew socks - have gotten us though.

So far the highlight of our trip has been the 6 inches of fluffy snow that came down all Christmas morning. It was not only beautiful but brought us some visitors (see Mr. and Mrs. Snowman) and provided hours of fun for Tim and our nephews.

Hot or cold…we hope your Christmas was wonderful

Jet Lag without the Travel

Sometimes our life makes us laugh... not a ha-ha laugh but more of an incredulous laugh. But even more often, we don’t notice things that are actually quite incredible. So here’s to stopping and realizing how unlikely reality can be.

This weekend as Tim and I - two Americans living in an Argentine neighborhood named Palermo Hollywood - ate at a Peruvian restaurant with a Venezuelan student and her Colombian fiancé. The next day we celebrated the Mexican Revolution in a public park designed by a French landscape architect by eating tacos with students from El Salvador and Mexico. And improbable as it may be, our two Mexican students are from Toluca where we lived for 10 years, and yet they didn't know us, nor us them, until we met here in Buenos Aires.

At midnight we got a call from a Chilean friend asking if he could stay the night with us. We felt obligated to extend him a bit of hospitality since we live rent-free thanks to an Argentine family who live in Panama and work for a U.S. company and have been generous enough to let us stay in their apartment. In the morning we served Guatemalan coffee to our guest as he told to of his plans to move with his family to Guatemala at the end of this month.

That evening after tea with a Scottish friend and her Argentine boyfriend, we invited our neighbors, a French and Brazilian couple, to Saint Andrews Scottish Presbyterian church to hear a soprano named Mercedes Olivera sing Beethoven and Mozart.

And right now I feel like I have jet lag just writing about it :-)

Spring-Fever and Goodbyes

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We have 6 more weeks till the end of the school year at the youth leadership institute. Everyone here has Spring fever pretty badly. They are mentally ready for summer break and are physically worn out, so getting them to work is a challenge.

In December we graduate our largest group yet - about 12 people - many of whom then return to their home country to put into practice what they've been learning. They've been an amazing group and we'll miss them.

We Have Haitian Roots

Over the years people have asked us if we have plans to translate the Raices (Roots) textbook for youth ministry into other languages, like English (so they could use it in India and Africa) or Portuguese for the 192 million Brazilians who share the continent. So far no one has been interested enough to translate 350 pages but we created a graphic alternative: almost 200 clip art images that illustrate the main points of the book.

A month ago a friend and colleague told us he wanted to use the principles of Raices to train youth leaders during an upcoming trip to Haiti. We explained the idea behind the clip art and yesterday we got an email from him which included a handout for his training sessions which includes our illustrations with Creole subtitles.

We’re thrilled that we can help train leaders in Haiti and that what we’ve invested in is continuing to produce dividends worldwide… we thought you might be too.

43 Days and 43 Nights

Our smiles in these pictures reflect how we feel about what's been keeping us occupied for the last 43 days since we published our last blog post. Here's a few of the things that have filled those days and nights:

• Involvement in 4 training events for youth leaders (3 in Argentina and 1 in Paraguay)
• Trying to finish up a 2 year project to update our ParaLideres.org website (5000+ visitors/day)
• Participating in a convention with 3500 youth leaders from around Latin America
• Writing and publishing articles, blogs and online courses
• Grading and giving feedback on student projects
• Mentoring, counseling and praying for our apprentices (67 of them, representing 12 countries)
• Hosting international colleagues who come to teach at the EJ youth leadership institute

Spring Forward

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Today is the first day of Spring for the southern hemisphere. It's also "Students Day" which means no classes (well, no classes for most schools, but not ours... it's like the Energizer bunny, it's keeps on going).